I'm a dweller. I tend to dwell on past experiences, what was said, how someone reacted, who did what, etc. It doesn't always serve me well. I go over & over what has already happened then forget to live in the current moment and move forward! For a couple days, as I continued to dwell on this past weekend while still wearing the pink wristband, I was reminded of another recent experience where the focus was specifically to "live in the moment." To avoid being overly verbose, I'll just say this, it was eye opening and a new goal of mine is to stop dwelling so much and enjoy the present!!! So here's my recap of the #womensproam2016 so I can fully appreciate this awesome experience and then move forward:
This was the most prepared I've ever felt going into a meet. I feel like I finally stopped chasing numbers & started working towards being a better lifter technically & mentally. One of the things Wade always says is "take what the day gives." I always heard that in a negative manner meaning if it's a bad day, take it down a notch, but I've learned (after hearing it multiple times now) it goes both ways! If the day is going good, take it & run with it! The hard part is recognizing what the day has presented. Saturday was a good squat day for me & it was time to take it. I had originally planned to open at 225, but a few weeks before the meet, I missed what was supposed to be my "easy opener." I made the decision to lower the opener to 220 and then after a few more days of thinking & debating internally, lowered it to 215, a weight I was confident I could get. Do you know how hard it was to change that number on the website?!?! Excruciating! Especially considering that was the same opener when I last competed in November. I'm supposed to be getting better! All this work on squats, completing an entire 16 week training cycle & I'm opening at the same weight as last meet? Noooooo! But I defeated my internal ego demons & reluctantly put down 215 as the official opener on the website. This turned out to be a blessing in disguise as it placed me in the first flight throughout the meet. This meant I would be able to watch, cheer on, & video my teammates who were in the 2nd & 3rd flights without having to worry about being nervous for my next attempts. See how things work out? Anyway, back to squats. After some debate on when to start wrapping my knees, how many out I am & a near fight with my husband/handler, I smoked the opener. What??? I never smoke the squat opener in a meet. Who am I? This is where I should insert a funny thing Jennifer says that applies as the answer to that question: "My name is Annie Tallent Fry and I'm a good squatter." Don't ask. So the plan for the 2nd attempt is "if the opener goes well, 235." Yes, I'm that much of a meet day head case that I have to have the qualifier. So 235 it is, no thinking involved. It goes easy (& no near fights with husband/handler this time). Again, 235 went easy. Huh? I'm really not sure what to do here at a place where squats actually went well! I honestly did not have a planned 3rd attempt. I knew what I wanted, but it wasn't in the plan. The plan was to take what the day gives, good or bad. My usual 3rd attempt is a repeat of the 2nd attempt or the planned 2nd if I screwed up on the 1st, but here I am having squatted well two attempts in a row! What do I do?! I looked at Wade in the head judges chair (it's a strange, but interesting dynamic when your coach is also a judge; haters would say a conflict of interest, but then they also wouldn't know Wade). We had this seemingly 5 min back & forth dialogue where I mouthed numbers at him & he shook his head (you can see part of it in the video). I finally got the nod at 250 & off I go to the table. He believed in me & I didn't have a chance not to. Time for the third attempt. Handler/husband wraps my knees and I go up to the bar & I get the standard butt smack. Take an extra second to gather myself & all I can think is "damn, that's a good wrap, don't waste it." I giggle a little to myself (another inside joke). All I know is I'm not going to quit no matter what. Unrack. Oh that feels light. Weird. I hear various yells & cues, primarily "settle!" & "patience!" I squat & the pace is slower than I'd like it to be, but I hit the hole, rebound & start ascending. It gets stuck at the sticking point and somehow I never quit and end up grinding it out. It was the greatest lifting moment of my life! A 20 lb meet PR and the most weight I've ever held on my back period. Lots of cheers & hugs & high fives & now it's time to eat & relax a little & watch my sister-mates do the same. And they did.
After watching Jennifer set a new all time world record squat (NBD), it was time for me to start warming up on bench. Warm ups go well & I'm ready to go in plenty of time. A few weeks ago, I said out loud in training, one of my goals is to go 3 for 3 on bench. I don't care what the numbers are, I just want to hit all three attempts. I asked my teammates to help hold me to that & keep the ego in check. I've hit 155 in training recently, but bench is a bitch on meet day. I can't explain it, it just is, so it cannot be taken for granted. There may not be any magic fairy dust on the platform, but I'm convinced there is evil demon contaminate scattered on the bench platform. I opened with 135, an old nemesis that I've come to rely on as a close friend (we've seen each other many many times now). 135 goes as an easy confidence building opener like it should. I call the planned 2nd attempt, 145, which has also become a fairly easy weight to hit consistently in the gym. I get the lift, but one of the judges threw a red light which means my butt must have come off the bench a little. Dammit! Now I'm stressing and I'm at the point where in order to hit my goal, 3 for 3 on bench, I HAVE to keep my ass in check (literally & figuratively). I call for 150. I wanted to ask for 146 (ha!) but I didn't think it would go over too well asking for half pound plates.... So 150 it is. I had just given the table my 3rd attempt and Jennifer runs over & asks what it was going to be. I told her & she said "hew, okay just checking." My teammates take "keeping me in check" seriously! So it's time to bench. Handler/husband hands off. Jennifer is knelt down on one side. Wes is knelt down on the other (we're very serious about keeping asses in check here, did I mention that?). The load is decent, not great, and I start to grind automatically. I feel my butt start to come off the bench & I could see that one of the judges had already thrown the red. Instead of pressing it on out. I gave up. I shook my head & said take it. I'm not proud of this. It was disappointing. I could blame this or that, but bottom line, I quit. The exact thing I thought I had just finished learning about during squats!!! I could have pressed it on out and got all three reds, but I didn't even give the judges a chance to make the call. Arrgghhhh! Handler/husband is mad. Coach is clearly frustrated. I'm irritated with myself. So much for 3 for 3 on bench. Womp womp. Insert lots of sadness here. I still ended with a 10 lb meet PR so it isn't all that terrible, but certainly not the best I could have done. The bench unicorn still remains to be seen, but it's getting closer. I told you bench is a bitch. You can bet your ass (& mine) that I won't make that same mistake again.
There was a loooooong break before deadlifts. I had plenty of time to eat and hydrate & rest & think about that missed bench attempt, but when it was time to warm up, I tried to think about the task at hand: just focus on the opener, Annie: 275. One attempt at a time. And don't think about the fact that I need exactly 305 lbs to get a 700 total, the ultimate goal. Grrrrrr. I had cooled down too much and had to go through my whole pre-warmup, warmup routine again. By the time I started pulling, I felt better, but my back was starting to get tight (probably from squatting a PR a few hours before!!!). Warmups weren't feeling great. I couldn't find my groove (another Wade-ism I've come to rely on). I would normally pull 135 for a couple singles, 185x1, 225x1 and be done in the warmup room. Handler/husband saw my frustration and suggested I pull another single at 245 to see if it felt better. It did. My brain was finally ready to go. The opener didn't quite go as well as I'd like though. I didn't quite hit that sweet spot I know & love. So instead of going for my planned 2nd attempt, 305, I went with 295 instead. Seems like a small margin to some, but 10 lbs can be huuuuge for 112.6 lb girls. 295 was the right call. I found that sweet spot again & put some confidence back in the game. Now with this newly rediscovered confidence, do I go for the PR? Do I go for the planned 3rd attempt anyway, 320? Do I let my ego take over again & screw me? I've found my groove, right, so why not go all in?! Deadlift is my bread and butter after all! Hell no!!! It's not even a question. "Always protect the total" is the mantra & deciding factor. 305 it is! I never doubted it was going. It wasn't as fast or easy as I'd like, but it went. All white lights. The coveted 700 lb total @ 114 is mine!!!! 700 on the nose, not a pound more or kilo or ounce or whatever unit of measurement you wanna use. It's mine! Everyone is happy. More cheers & hugs & high fives & I probably cried a little. Now.... Time to move on with the day and continue watching my teammates, friends, new acquaintances, and the rest of the ladies in the meet be badasses, set PRs, and break records. My tiny little piece of the story has ended and I was ready to see what else the day had in store!
To be successful, you have to have a plan, a mission, a goal, something to work towards and you have to be consistent in executing that plan, but you can't plan out every single moment. You have to be willing to make adjustments, if needed, in order to achieve the ultimate goal. You can't predict what will happen or how you will feel in the future or allow yourself to dwell in the past. All you can do is prepare for & execute the parts of the plan that you can control and then live everyday in the moment, take what each day gives you, appreciate it, learn from it, teach somebody else about it, and then move forward. Time to set some new goals, Annie! And yes I finally took off that 3 day old pink wristband!
❤️❤️❤️
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