Bob, Pat Summit and the power of a great coach

I have written this is 2 parts. The first was written on the day Coach Summit passed. What an incredible person, let alone great coach. To do what she did, to accomplish all that she did is a testament to her. She leaves behind a well blazed trail for all that follow. For those that are fans of Coach Summit, I hope you will see this as a tribute. I am finishing this today. A full week has passed since Bob's passing and I won't go into detail but, it has been hard and for me personally, a difficult time. This wasn't going to be my farewell to Bob but, I'm hoping again, that those that knew him and read this, will understand that it is a tribute and maybe see what he meant to me and to so many others. 

     

You don’t know who Bob is. Well, some of you will. Bob Shaefer was my mentor primarily in powerlifting. I’m not sure he’d say he ever coached me but, he did in many ways beyond the gym. I talked to Bob on Facebook messenger briefly, Thursday, June 23. I didn’t hear back from him so, I figured I’d check in over the weekend and get caught up. I had sent a decline press video and never heard back but, Bobby can get busy with many folks and looking at cool and sweet animal videos so, I didn’t press. Saturday morning, since I was home, meant that it was time to get down in the gym. Missy was going to train and I had several coming and knew it would be a busy morning. We also had house guests so, as per normal, it was going to be a busy day. June 25^th is my Dad’s birthday whom passed a few years back. I always try to post something on Father’s day and his birthday just to honor him and remember him. That morning, about 5:30 am, I got up, got to my computer getting dressed and prepping for the day and thought, I’ll scan Facebook and write something about my Dad. I had only scrolled a few posts when I saw a post by one of Bob’s former Underground members that Bob had passed apparently the night before. I was completely stunned and immediately saddened. Now, this is not a blog about Bob. I’m not sure that’s how I would want to honor him. I will get back to that later.

Today, we have all heard the news of Pat Summit and her passing. I can think of no coach that has a more profound influence on athletes, women and school whose outreach was global. Not only was she a great coach, to me, she was even a greater ambassador and mentor to her school, her sport, her athletes and all that she came in contact with. It’s people like this that are heroes to me.  I am amazed how both these people had such a dramatic impact on so many people and that is was so far reaching. To someone that so many would know worldwide like Coach Summit to someone that only a small circle of folks would know like Bobby. But, this isn’t what I want to get down to today either. That is left up to writers that are far beyond anything I can create and do it well enough to do it for a living and for you to watch on TV.

There is something that both of these people/coaches had in common. They believed. Now, allow me to explain, as best I can, how profound that is. We are all always told to believe in ourselves. We’ve heard it from our parents, teachers and such but, when someone tells you that they believe in you, the effect is dramatic. This is one of the themes that I saw with both these coaches. They believed, not only in what they were doing but, they believed in those that were around them. They taught their athletes to believe in them by the example of how they believed in the athlete. The power of this is immeasurable. When you see the resolve in a coach’s eye that you trust, that you love, and whom you so much believe in and you hear them tell you that they believe in you, that they know you can…it is empowering. I have seen over and over where this was what put an athlete where they needed to be to finally believe in themselves as much as the coach did. When this happens, it’s magical. That’s what these two coaches, and many like them, embody and teach and live day to day and inspires me to emulate and work towards the same.

So, I am not sure what that means really. I hope that you’ll read about Coach Summit, maybe learn about Bob and the coaches you enjoy watching and how inspire you. That finding belief is really a big deal and the catalyst to many good things. The empowerment of belief can make you unstoppable.

And now, how does this relate to my title? I don’t know, it doesn’t really. Here is what I want to say about Bob. First, you are going to hear many stories and tributes about Coach Pat Summit and they are well deserved. She is someone I greatly admired. Not because she was a woman that did it in a man’s world because, she is one of the most prolific coach’s and human beings I’ve ever witnessed. It wasn’t about her gender. Yes, of course, she was a pioneer and ambassador for women’s basketball and the Lady Vols but, it goes well beyond that. But she was a coach’s coach. She is one of the greats in a world of great coaches. To me, Bob was much the same. He was quiet. He had a tight circle but he loved his lifters intensely. He believed in you when you saw only reason to doubt and he taught, he pushed and was impatient when he had expectations of you. See, he wanted you to be held to a higher standard so that you’d create the highest standard for yourself and not be a baby about everything. That you would then make the standard the same for all in your charge. That when doubt crept in, you’d look at your body of work and stand tall on that. Bob believed in me. He insisted that I write. He insisted I compete and constantly stayed on me about resting more and that I gave too much of myself but would then applaud it when he knew it was the right thing to do and the way I did things. He told me once, “you will never reach your potential because you want to give to others”.  He understood this and my want for it. He supported it but wanted me to have no regrets and, I don’t. Bob and I spent countless hours shopping for the right gear for me and my gym, combing over notes for training and adapting his methods to mine to make them mine. Here are a few things he said that continue to have an effect on me to this day.

Make my training your own.

Bob spent countless hours developing his system. Then he spent more hours with me as we tweaked and adjusted it to the system I now use today. Even things he didn’t agree with, he’d work on them with me.

The real secret is consistent training. He told me this many times. He taught me not to get caught up in numbers all the time. That if I would do the work consistently, the numbers would come. He’d say, “don’t get caught up in linear progress”. He’d explain how things will ebb and flow but over the long run, progress will come, slow and steady and this is how slow and steady wins the race was born. How you hear from me about the Tortoise and the Hare and to be the turtle.

The real secret is when the training becomes intuitive. I’d love to tell everyone that has heard me say that, say that it was me that came up with it but, it was Bob.

The only bad session is a missed session. I have used this over and over and over and over. Bob got it from someone I’m sure but, I got it from him.

He also told me this…and I have shared it with some of you. The day will come when people won’t remember the weights you lifted. They will remember you as coach, Dad, friend, mentor, pal. Were you a good friend? Were you a good coach? Those are the things we will be measured by. I can’t recall exactly how he said it and now, that is how I tell it. Bob was these things to me. He was with me through my biggest moments in the sport to my darkest days personally. Bob also taught me. We’d talk about supplements and training and little things we’d learned along the way. We’d write and read things we both wrote.

Last I’ll share about Bob, he loved animals, especially dogs. I can’t recall how many times he said it but, it was many, “dog’s rule” and he was right.

So, perhaps this is about Bob and I hope you get to know a Bob like I did. I hope that if you know me, if you’ve been coached my me or I’ve worked with you, you’ve heard these things, felt that belief like I did and that I’ve had a small effect positively on you. Knowing Bobby, he’d be pissed that I shared this but, if he haunts me, so be it. Bob was one of the most influential people on my life. He was kind to me when he had nothing to gain by doing so and became a lifelong friend whom I love, cherish and will now, miss. Don’t be sad though, I’m so glad, blessed and grateful to have had someone like him. My hope is that when I’ve learned will continue to be passed on. So, here is to Bob, Coach Summit and all the coaches that work so hard to instill their belief in us in ourselves.

I think one of the Undergrounds own said it best the other day, John Louallen, “Bob is already up in heaven telling God about declines and how it will help his flat bench”. I chuckled when I read that and then in my mind, could totally see it.

It is Saturday, July 2nd now and it's still hard and difficult to put all this in perspective. I miss Bob and I know the family and the Underground folks hurt. I am to likely meet one of Bob's pupils tomorrow to receive his dog. Bob was only ever worried about his dogs. I made a promise to him, should something happen, I would take care of the dogs. In this case it is one. Bob so loved her and I know she had a happy home and right now, I'm sure she is scared and worried and unsettled. My hope is that she will find our family and home and make it her own. I know Bob would be happy knowing that I have her. It is comforting to me to be able to fulfill a promise to someone that I love dearly. So, in closing...love as hard as you can as often as you can. And for all that read this, my hope for you is that all of you have a Bob as part of your life. I was truly blessed with mine.

To Bobby, a shot of Manny, a beer and a slice of pizza with anchovies…

God speed, Bobby. Rest well till we meet again. I love you, man!